Thes are messages we received in our inbox. We have given advice and set up a poll to seek public opinion. If you have an issue bothering you, feel free to send a mail to [email protected]

 Dear Amaka,

my case is kind of complicated because I don’t know what to do, I am married for 2years now, my husband is hot tempered, he gets angry unnecessarily and he does not allow me express my feelings. He feels as a woman I am supposed to be submissive, coz even the bible said so, he always say as a wife u have to tolerate everything your husband does to you. He hardly admit he is faulty, he reminds me of how he has done a whole lot of things for me,(financially) I am getting fed up but each time I look @ my child I believe tomorrow will be better. But d truth is I don’t know how long I can hold on. Please what do I do. I need answers ASAP.thanks
Dear Sister,

This is a really serious one because you are married to him, but i would like you to talk to him when he is calm and happy, tell him how you feel and how he has been hurting you, express yourself deeply and pour out your heart, see if this would cause a change in his attitude. Try as much as possible not to raise your voice when he is raising his too as this would led to argument and aggravate further.

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Dear Amaka,

i am a 26 year old female working in government , i am in a relationship with this 43 year old men
his definitely not married we been together for a year now and we always breaking up and making up , my concern is will he marry me because i think his old and i can play such games with him problem is i love him really.
Thank you

Dear Sister,

In every relationship its important to define your stand and try to know your stand, you should sit him down and try to ask him where what you have is leading to, not that you should force him to marry you, its just you talking to him to understand where it is heading to. If his response does not make you comfortable i think you should try and move on. If its about the age i think age is a number especially as he is not married.

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Dear Amaka,

please help am i being stupid to wait for this guy im still young i need Advice
Am a young lady(23yrs)I was dating a guy whom I love so much but had to leave him because of his mother’s trouble with me almost everytime,not quite long,I met a new guy,but since I have been dating the guy,I feel so empty,I don’t feel am in a relationshop not to talk of a secure one,he doesn’t call me,he barely chat with me on bbm,and he doesn’t want me to introduce him to any of my family as a fiance or boyfriend but he tells all his friends that I am his wife to be..of recent I read all his chat on social media with his female friends and what I saw broke me down in tears,he his looking for lovers and sugar mummies on everywhere,I don’t knw what to do,please you people should advice me,when we just started,he told me to delete my ex pictures and number which I did,but he still communicate with his own ex almost everyday…I NEED ADVICE please

My Dear,

Its quiet funny that a guy in a relationship would be looking for sugar mummy and other relationships, in all cases communication is key, you should talk to him about this but if he does not change my dear its important you try to move on, because a guy who would do this in a relationship would also do it in marriage. If you can deal with your husband looking for sugar mummies and lovers then you can go on and be with him even if he does not change.

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Dear Amaka,

My ex bestie is dating my first love, when he was still asking her out he kissed her, someone told when about it i asked her and she told me it wasn’t true and i just believed her because i trust her. Later that same day on social media, she told me that it actually happened, but she couldn’t face me to tell me, i asked her if she likes him she said no, she did but she has gotten over him, so i just told her not to accept that i still love him and she said she wouldn’t. After some months i started suspecting that she had already accepted so i asked her if she had accepted she said no then i asked him if she has accepted him, he said yes i asked him when? he said since but i didn’t believe him because i still trusted her. Then recently something happened so his friend told me that i should leave the guy alone that he is her boo so i asked her why his friend is calling him her boo and she said it is because she had accepted him that she is sorry, i cried then i told her that we are no longer friends. The same day i found out that he kissed her he told me that day that he still loves me but he doesn’t want to date me yet. I need advice.

My dear,

First i would like to say when you say someone is your ex, shouldn’t you move on you are over and done with him. well i do not know why your friend has chosen to go on with this even when you told her that you still in love with him, you should talk to her more about it but i must tell you that a guy who dated you and is asking your best friend out is not worth it, i actually feel there is no need for you to fight over him, i do feel both you and your friend should let him go, move on and be happy.

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